


voice message (beta)

by tob2os



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Confessions, M/M, Pining, idk what other tags to use
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-02
Updated: 2020-04-02
Packaged: 2021-02-28 17:48:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,965
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23451229
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tob2os/pseuds/tob2os
Summary: “ow! what are you doing? hello? where are we going?”“for god’s sake shut up, will you? people will think i’m kidnapping you, dumbass hinata.”“aren’t you, kind of?”au where hinata crashes kageyama's youth camp like he'd originally planned, instead of the miyagi one. with no formal invitation, no living arrangements have been made for him, and what was kageyama supposed to do, leave him to die on the streets?told through a voice message format, inspired by the song voice message by iu. 99% painful pining kageyama 1% actual fic
Relationships: Hinata Shouyou/Kageyama Tobio
Comments: 22
Kudos: 188





	voice message (beta)

**Author's Note:**

> this was the first fic i've ever wrote, and while i don't think the contents are really that good, i do actually love this idea and would love to revamp it one day so i'm posting it as a beta :') and also to expose my own cringey first fic writing.
> 
> this fic is HEAVILY loyal to the song and is based 100% of the flow of the lyrics, hence i strongly recommend you listen to it/read the lyrics beforehand [here](https://youtu.be/60FTovUoN3Y)
> 
> also, the verb forms are wildly inconsistent. i am aware of this please forgive me i lost the motivation to keep track during the cringe skimming i did before posting OTL.

**_“you’re a fucking idiot, you know that?”_ **

he wasn’t there to answer him. the faint splatter of the shower head, accompanied by a horrendously off-pitch version of some vague english song (it wasn’t kageyama’s fault that he didn’t recognize it- he was sure that hinata was horrifically butchering the english, he’d seen the test scores,) trickled through the walls, and he almost laughed. 

_so fitting._ if it had been two days ago, he would’ve stormed into that bathroom, swiped at the boy’s head, hissed at him to keep his stupid voice down, _"are you a dumbass?"_

today he sat, long torso slouched against the wall of his room, in complete darkness. there was no blanket on the bed below him, the prickly surface of the polyester mattress picking at his skin. he could go get it, go fetch it from just a few feet next to him, but he didn’t; somehow, this felt right.

**_“always ruining everything. for me._ **

**_maybe even for you."_ **

when he’d been told of his invitation to the national youth camp, the first thing he’d felt, even before surprise, was relief. the reason for that relief had been standing right next to him, gawking upwards at him with an expression halfway between admiration and jealousy. he hadn’t realized it until he was on the train (he had miraculously managed to catch it on time), sitting alone all the way at the edge of his bench, his volleyball journal spread out on his lap, words he could barely read staring back at him (although he would never admit this to hinata- these words were always legible, he swore). 

it made sense for him to feel relief. _right?_

he’d worked, every single day. every single day that he could’ve spent playing outside, with his friends, or watching t.v, he’d worked. it was only natural to feel relief at this invitation, after all those years, and he did. his heart skipped, literally, at the prospect of all those players, bursting with talent and skill, gathering at the same place as he was: people he’d only read about, boarding their trains now, just like he was. yet it wasn’t their faces that kept popping up in his head.

see, he’d been watching, these last months. 

-

he was almost surprised when a face too familiar showed up at that gym, only moments after he did. almost. he was moreso impressed that they hadn’t managed to run into each other on the way there, being on the same route and all. while confusion and disbelief shrouded the faces of everyone around him, he stared, chest tightening at what felt like, peculiarly enough, frustration. _of course he would. of course this would happen._

right as the coaches approached hinata, bewilderment veiling their movements, he stared straight at him, and there was no flinch in his gaze. two words, bizarre to everyone else’s ears, and so familiarly unfamiliar to his: _i’m here!_

hinata was dragged away before he could reply. too many eyes were staring at him now, asking the unanimous question, but he had no reply to give. they’d probably find the answer inscrutable anyway, as was the case for what seemed like his whole existence. 

instead, he busied himself with the ball in his hands, turning away from the baffled faces to his hands and the leather underneath them. _idiot. here i was, thinking i’d finally get the time._

-

hinata was lucky he wasn't been arrested. he instead announced, (with a hint of dolefulness, though he’d probably thought it to be masked), that he would be their ball boy, even proudly declaring his less-than-impressive height to this room full of monsters.

kageyama never wanted to admit that he couldn’t do something that the other boy could, but in that moment, he hesitated.

-

 ** _”sorry.”_** a sigh, and a waver in his voice so loud it almost manifested visibly. **_“for… that first day… it was complicated.”_**

that entire first day, he spent refusing to acknowledge hinata’s intrusion, not speaking to him once. aside from there being almost no chances to even have a proper conversation, he wasn't sure what he’d even say. it distracted him far more than he was comfortable admitting, trying to form the words to express exactly what was convoluting his already-complicated train of thoughts. it was hopeless, really, and he wasn't ready yet, not yet ready to try to catch his words up to his heart. 

it was more than a little strange. even back in the beginning of the school year, when they could hardly be called teammates (let alone friends, or partners), they’d always spent their hours together: practicing together, eating together, racing to the gym together. now he was pointedly ignoring hinata, uncharacteristically engaging in conversation with strangers during his breaks: just to avoid the possibility of interaction. when he sat his water bottle back down on the floor, he frowned. it felt awkward, foreign, seeing that yellow bottle by itself next to the beige walls. was it the unfamiliar gymnasium? 

a gaze dragged him out of his concentrated staring as he realized that eyes were on him: eyes he was too accustomed to. eyes that seemed to know exactly what he was contemplating, and nudging him towards the answer, one that only they would know. 

out of convenience and basic logic, they’d always placed their water bottles next to each other’s, in the same corner of the gym every day. they’d always take their breaks together, discuss sets throughout their rest, continuing the flow of their play between sips of water; it had just made sense. 

it was ridiculous really, that he would feel off-put because of a water bottle. 

-

during lunch, they ate separately; he took special care to make sure he was seated so his back was facing hinata. even so, he felt those eyes boring into his back, and the shinzen boy in front of him laughed nervously. _aren’t you guys friends? he’s staring pretty hard._

he didn't answer, tried not to think about it. if he did, the tightness in his chest would return, strangling his entire ribcage until his heart flew upwards right through his throat and out his mouth. 

even when komori and sakusa approached him, he answered half-heartedly, not fully in his head that one of the top 3 national aces was in front of him; somewhere deep inside, a logical version of him scolded him, demanding he be more present in his reality. _but this is my reality._ sakusa probably couldn’t tell, and didn’t care if he could. komori’s gaze lingered a bit too long, however, the discomfort in his stare telling him that everyone felt it. the air between them, this bizarre, deliberate silence, had been so miasmic that even strangers could tell there was something wrong.

kageyama had done many stupid things in his life, but the risk he took in getting up alone in that moment probably made the top of the list. the second he took that step towards the counter, tray in hand, he heard a tinkling from the table behind him, and he almost threw down his plate. _dammit._

he quickened his steps, managing to fold his face into what he hoped was a pleasant expression at the lady taking his tray away. _it’s over if i look back._ so he kept forward, increasing the speed of his strides all the way down the hall to the bathroom. 

**_“you probably knew. i mean. for all your stupidity, you’re like a fucking sponge for emotions, i swear. or maybe i’m just not good at hiding things like that.”_ **

it was a futile effort, he knew- he’s never quite been able to defeat him on speed. and of course, it came, the inevitable calling of his name from behind him. much to his consternation, it came from far closer than he’d braced for, and his chest began to numb.

“what?” he just barely turned to face him, not daring to meet his eyes. 

“why are you avoiding me?”

kageyama been prepared for annoyance, for indignation, for frustration: emotions he could mimic and reply to without compunction. what hit him instead was a question too unsure, and a voice too quiet, too soft. all he could do was swallow. 

“are you embarrassed?”

it wasn’t like hinata. it was that, the abashment in his words, that finally made kageyama turn around. _it can’t be him if he sounds like that._

**_“it wasn’t like that.”_ **

but it was him, messy orange tufts of hair and unblinking brown eyes, staring straight at him. and as soon as he saw hinata break eye contact first, glance sideways down at the ground waiting for a response, and those hands, always too confident, pull on his shirt nervously, kageyama knew it was over. 

_there’s no chance for me now._

he walked away, hinata’s question left unanswered. 

-

when practice ended, he was quick to attend to his things, throwing his towel and knee pads into his bag. they’d been given a tour of their living spaces earlier during practice, and he was ready to bury his face in his pillow, door shut to keep away any one boy who’d kick down all his defenses to ask stupid, distressing questions. _away. just for once._

in his hurry out the door, he ran nearly straight into atsumu, who smirked and asked him if he had someone to meet. his face must’ve betrayed too much startlement, because atsumu quickly laughed and assured, "i’m just kidding, tobio-kun. god, from the look on your face, you’d think you really do have someone to meet." an additional glance at his hastily-packed belongings later, atsumu ordered him to "wait just a second, i’ll come with you. our rooms are right next to each other anyway."

he wanted to decline but hardly could, and just as he was fretting, trying to stand in his position as furtively as possible, he heard the one voice he’d been so desperately evading.

"...well, there’s no living accommodations for you. since you weren’t invited."

coach yamiji was scratching his head, obviously apologetic, while hinata stared up at him, face noticeably less lively _(not that i keep track)._

"do you have anyone you can call? ask for some money for a hotel room?"

kageyama knew hinata didn’t have such a thing. who would he call and how would he get the money? he wasn’t the type to get his mom involved; he could tell from the hard expression hinata had carried the whole day that he wasn’t quite ready to let go of his pride, and worry his mother on top of it. it was clear that nobody really knew what to do with him, _understandable._

"are you coming?"

a blonde head called out from in front of him, heading towards the door with a packed bag in hand. most of the others had cleared out by now, all exhausted and headed towards their dorms.

he’d intended on going with him; he really had. he’d started towards the exit, and had just stepped outside, when he hesitated. before he’d really known what he was saying, his voice had traitorously called out for atsumu to go on ahead; _i’ll be right there._

a shrug and a "see you!" later, he was left alone, leaning stiffly on the gym door and waiting for hinata to finish talking to the coach. kageyama wasn’t sure what he’d do, but something kept him there. _well, i can’t let him sleep on the fucking street. what if he dies or something?_

a deep sigh reverberated through his body, hands in his pockets and feet pettily kicking the small pebbles at his feet. _isn’t he done talking to him yet? what’s taking so long?_

gathering the last drop of his cowardly courage, he stole a glance upwards, only to find the coach standing alone. an alarmed glance around the gym caught the edges of the hinata’s silhouette, heading out the other door. _why is that dumbass going that way?_

huffing in both disbelief and self-consciousness, he began sprinting towards the other entrance, willing his feet to act before he could have a chance to anxiously change his mind. 

he’d fully expected to have caught him near the door, but halfway to it, he caught hinata’s form speeding away on the sidewalk, even farther away from where he was standing. 

_damn him and his… fast..ness._

gritting his teeth, he put more kick into his step, chasing him down the sidewalk until he garnered a few too many concerned looks from outsiders. that annoying, intolerable voice rang in his head, jeering that _a young, towering boy with undoubtedly a scowl on his face, sprinting down the sidewalk well past dinner time? you’ll probably get the cops called on you soon._ he could practically almost see the blonde hair and glasses manifest in front of him, never missing an opportunity to call out his fatuousness.

so he sighed, and slowed down his feet, burying his chin into his scarf. the wind was unrelenting, and he was sure his hands would pay for abandoning his gloves later, even with them buried as deep as they would go in his pockets. 

he focused on not letting hinata’s figure leave his sight, tracing him with his eyes a few yards away from him. those few yards seemed infinite as he attempted, to no avail, to catch up in a nonchalant manner. three streetlights consistently stood between them, their orange lights reflecting off the small heaps of snow on the side of the roads. every so often, a car would race past him, and he’d be forced to tear his eyes away from the boy to avoid a stream of dirtied slush flying his way. he must’ve passed at least a dozen storefronts by now; it being a friday night didn’t help, herds of people buzzing excitedly all around the streets. it was only when he almost ran into a familiar mailbox, that he realized he was standing in front of his dorms. _what the hell am I even doing? i should’ve just come here in the first place._

but there was hesitation even in his thoughts, an unwillingness to just let hinata disappear into the night. so he looked back up, ready to will his eyes on that orange head again, only to find nothing. sudden panic rushed him forwards, pulling his steps into a run once more, and his eyes darted everywhere that they could: looking for hinata. he was nowhere to be found on the streets, not on the sidewalks, not on the sides of the road; he’d seemingly disappeared into thin air.

in his blind sprinting, he nearly ran straight into an intersection, and was faced with angry cars screeching at him, drivers cursing at him from behind the glass. a particularly irate one had even rolled down his windows, yelling at him to _watch where you’re going, you idiot! what do you think you’re doing?_

as much as he should’ve met the driver’s eyes, directly behind his car, across the street, he caught sight of a small convenience store. it had clear glass walls, and through them he saw the blur of orange he’d been scanning so desperately for. wordlessly, he disregarded the driver, jogging across the street, before he stopped. 

it had finally caught up to him.

_dammit._  
_what am i even going to say?_

unable to open the glass entrance, he scurried to an alley at the end of the store, crouching down and sighing. _what am i even doing?_

then he came.

that light, carefree stride that almost mimicked a skip, it came straight past his eyes and continued onwards, and kageyama’s body moved on instinct, the hood of hinata’s jacket soon finding itself gripped in his fist. the boy let out a surprised yelp, throwing out his right arm instinctively at who he must’ve thought was an attacker.

_probably not the best way to have done this._

he grabbed hinata's flailing arm with his other hand, hissing in his ear, “it’s me, dumbass. calm down. for god’s sake.”

hinata’s movements stopped abruptly, spinning around to make sure the face matched the voice.

“what are you doing?”

wide eyes, still startled and shocked, bore straight into his face, relaxing considerably at the familiar face and _i swear to god._

releasing hinata’s hood, kageyama pushed his hands back into his pockets. “you don’t have anywhere to stay, do you? idiot.”

any residual fear seemed to seep away from his eyes, a whine returning to his expression as hinata replied, ”what the heck? you just came here to say that? how did you even know i was here?”

he sighed. _no way i’m answering that._

instead he rolled his eyes, noticing a plastic bag hanging off hinata’s left elbow. “what did you buy?”

kageyama didn’t wait for an answer, yanking the bag towards him and opening it. inside were two water bottles, a hot pack, and a sandwich. he wordlessly slung the bag onto the crook of his own arm and grabbed for hinata’s hood again. 

“ow! what are you doing? hello? where are we going?”

“for god’s sake shut up, will you? people will think i’m kidnapping you, dumbass hinata.”

“aren’t you, kind of?”

hinata didn’t stop complaining the whole route, and kageyama was secretly glad; there was nothing he dreaded more than a repeat of their uncharacteristically quiet, strained interaction from earlier. 

when they arrived in front of the living dorms, he finally let go of the hood, and began quietly to approach a set of windows. _this dumbass is going to ask more idiotic questions. i just know it._ he cursed himself. _why him?_

“hello? what are we doing? for the millionth time, i’m-”

_bingo._

kageyama interrupted him with a hand over his mouth, hissing in his face, “shut up if you want a roof over your head tonight.”

that shut him up quickly. hinata’s sudden silence, pupils blown wide right next to kageyama’s, alerted kageyama of how close their faces were, and he startled, willing his body to jump back. but it seemed to hesitate, relishing in the way he could feel a warm breath on his palm, slightly chapped lips brushing on the soft skin of the inside of his hand. it was only when he met hinata’s eyes again, full of confusion but unwilling to move away, that kageyama’s body finally caught up to him. kageyama dropped his hand and spun around as fast as he could; as much as the dark probably cloaked the blush on his cheeks, he wasn’t willing to take any risks.

as quietly as he could, he slid his hand under a small opening in the window, unlocking the latch with minimal struggle. pulling it upwards, as high as it would go, he waved hinata over. tossing his bag inside, he soon followed, and held his hand out to help the other boy crawl inside. “try to be quiet too, for once in your life.”

if there was a grumble of a reply, he ignored it. 

he thanked the gods that he’d left his windows open earlier. 

-

jostling a clean towel through his damp hair, kageyama cursed the other boy internally for forcing him to chase him through the snow; _now i’m somehow cold and sweaty._

hinata was still sitting on the floor, staring up at him with wide eyes. he looked so hesitant, a bit too nervous, a near-carbon copy of his form at their first practice match, that kageyama immediately felt a little guilty. 

“what are you looking like that for? i’m not going to kill you.”

hinata jumped a little at his sudden voice, but his shoulders seemed to relax. “it’s just- this is your room, isn’t it? am i allowed to be here? they said 'no guests in your room, under any circumstances’, right? can i sleep here? won’t they find out? what if they kick you out? what if-”

he wanted to stifle him with a pillow, though not entirely out of annoyance. the worried furrow of hinata’s eyebrows, barely visible behind the dripping limpness of his bangs, was an expression kageyama really couldn’t afford to keep looking at.

settling for throwing the pillow at his face, he rolled his eyes before replying, “just don’t get found out. besides, what else are you gonna do? eat a sandwich at a convenience store and sleep on the streets?”

hinata looked sheepishly up at him before taking his shoes off (“a bit late, aren’t you?”), and leaned against the desk. it wasn’t a small room, not for one person, but between the single bed, closet, and desk, there was nowhere for him to sleep. 

“there’s only one bed.”

“thank you for pointing out the obvious. you’re sleeping on the floor. and you can hardly complain, so don’t.”

“i wasn’t going to!”

digging around in his bag, he threw a clean towel at hinata, an “and you’re taking a shower. come on. and be quiet. remember that your idiotic ass can’t be caught.”

-

_can this idiot get any dumber?_

hinata was fast asleep on the floor beneath him, limbs sprawled out and snoring like he was in the comforts of his own bedroom. _what kind of person is this relaxed in a situation like this?_ it baffled him that hinata could sleep so soundly, on the floor of a dorm he’d snuck into at a national level camp, while he, who was rightfully there by invitation, fretted on the bed above him. 

part of it was that kageyama never slept quite right without a blanket. and as much as he’d wanted to roll his eyes, dump hinata on the floor next to him and tell him to figure it out himself, there was something about the way his small form had been curled up in a fetal position below him, hair still half wet from the shower, that had pulled on his heart, _just a little_ , made him feel like he would be the worst person alive to leave him there. so he’d thrown him his blanket, _and the idiot was way too happy about it too._

that _thanks, kageyama!_ , accompanied by _that stupid smile_ , had thrown off his entire balance, and all he’d managed to do was stare back, until hinata happily flopped back down, this time covered with the blanket. 

_dammit._ his face was uncomfortable, facial muscles contorted into positions they weren’t accustomed to. he wasn’t sure if he was grimacing, or smiling, or grimacing to possibly avoid smiling. 

they’d slept next to each other dozens of times before: at training camps, away at tokyo, during golden week. it had always felt natural to set up their futons next to each other, no question. he’d only started becoming conscious of it recently, during their summer camp. 

the truth was that he’d realized he hated fighting with hinata.

not their petty fights over the last milk carton, or who got to the club room first: the body-slinging, shouting, not-sitting-together-on-the-bus-like-we-always-do fighting. when they’d fought, that time, he’d wanted so badly to be stubborn, to believe he was right. and he hadn’t completely believed otherwise: he’d known what the quick was, and what the boy had proposed sounded completely absurd, at the time. but when hinata had stopped talking to him, started sitting next to yamaguchi during lunch times, spending breaks talking with yachi, he’d wanted to give anything to get him back. and when he’d come to the dorms to find hinata’s futon on the other side of the room, it had felt like he’d thrown a rock at his chest, an unignorable heavy sensation of aching in his bones. if hinata had told him, right there, that he would come back next to him in exchange for the moon, kageyama would’ve lassoed at the sky with all the strength he had.

but he hadn’t told hinata said that, hadn’t said anything that he’d wanted to. he hadn’t known how, _never knew how._

and then hinata had complimented him.

when they’d finally gotten their quick down, the truth was that he’d looked at hinata first; he knew where the ball had gone, because he’d felt it in his fingertips. so he’d instead averted his eyes elsewhere, and when hinata turned from the ball to him, his entire face had lit up with so much glee, so much excitement, and he’d near cavorted all the way across the court to kageyama. and it had been better than giving him the moon, just to hear him say that one line, _'you really are amazing!'_

all the heaviness had dissolved. 

and that night, when hinata had moved his futon back next to his, babbling away about _we need to practice that more, i can’t wait for tomorrow, do you think this will work against seijoh?_ , he’d first noticed it. he saw hinata next to him: hinata in all his sparkling eyes, radiant smile, cloudless voice, for the first time.

and ever since, kageyama had been watching. 

-

it was nearing 3am, and kageyama still laid there, staring at the ceiling, completely unable to let sleep take him. the only thing he could hear was the gentle, rhythmic snoring of hinata below him, and he sighed, rolling over to face the wall. knees curled into his chest to make do for his missing blanket, he shuddered a little at the chill: as grateful as he was to have left the window open earlier, the december cold had not been kind to his room. he groaned out loud, surprising himself and freezing as hinata’s snoring stopped abruptly. _dammit._

he held his breath for a few seconds, waiting for his snoring to resume, and although it didn’t, light, consistent wheezes told him it was safe to relax. 

this really was a handful. 

**_“it’s your fault, too, you know. for making me confused. you know i’m not good at things like this. actually, it’s really all your fault.”_ **

a violent buzz from under his pillow almost sent him jumping, and he silently cursed as he scrambled to dig his phone out from under him. squinting at the far-too-bright screen in front of him, he wanted to roll his eyes and throw his phone in panic at the same time, reading the words “hinata shoyo” on the screen. _why’s this idiot texting me? he’s literally next to me._

_'are you awake?'_

he answered audibly. “yes. why are you texting me, dumbass? i’m literally right here.”

he heard hinata shuffling the blanket to sit up, wrapping it around him, as he replied, “well, i didn’t know if you were asleep! i didn’t want to wake you by talking.”

to his dismay, kageyama felt his face soften, and he thanked the lords he was facing the wall.

“well, if i had been asleep, the buzzing would have woken me up anyway.”

“...sorry.”

it was such a farcical reply. _what is he apologizing for?_

kageyama sighed, for the millionth time today, and flipped to face hinata. “it’s fine. i was awake, i told you.”

when he opened his eyes to see hinata, hair even messier than usual, only one eye visible from his wild fringe, he almost lost it then. but hinata laughed, exclaiming, “your hair… it actually kind of looks like mine!”

kageyama’s hand immediately flew to his crown, defensively flattening the stray strands. 

“shut up. no it doesn’t.”

“what are you grumbling about, grumbleyama?”

the tinkling of his voice, laughter invariably woven into it, was quieter than usual, hoarser from his sleepiness. 

“i’m not grumbling!”

“yes you are!”

“you’re impossible.” it only made hinata laugh more, giggling until he delivered the final blow.

“i think it looks nice like that too, kageyama. a different side to you, almost!” 

and he smiled, that stupid smile. kageyama’s instant reaction was to ask hinata how many people he’d smiled like that at, how many people had seen it. it almost slipped out too, but he stopped himself: just barely catching the words from leaving his lips. the truth was that he already knew the answer, knew from the boy’s nature- personified sunshine- that kageyama was hardly the sole recipient of that smile, far from it. he didn’t like the pang in his chest that followed the thought.

“go back to bed, dumbass.” hinata was obviously still sleepy, yawning every other second and blinking far too slowly. but he didn’t answer, breaking eye contact to stare downwards, and kageyama sighed. 

“what? do you need to go to the bathroom again?”

when hinata looked up again, his face radiated sheepishness, replying “no… i could really use some water, though.”

“you’re so much trouble. i should’ve left you in the streets.” kageyama wished his movements matched his words. but instinct led him upwards, no delay in his movements as he swung his legs over the side of his bed to stand, and rolling his eyes at the apologetic whispers of the other boy, he headed towards the door.

“stay put. don’t get caught, or try your hardest not to. dumbass.”

**_“your fault, for saying things like that. even though you didn’t even mean anything by them, right?”_ **

“will you go to bed now?” kageyama had fetched the glass of water, like hinata had requested, and hinata had taken it from his hands way too enthusiastically (he was surprised he didn’t spill it, to be honest), gulping quickly and flashing him that unbearable smile again. it left kageyama scrambling to crawl back into bed.

“i think i will… and kageyama?”

“what?”

“you should sleep too. you’ll wake up late tomorrow, and miss breakfast.”

kageyama didn’t even have to look to feel that smile in hinata’s words again. 

“okay.” it came out too shaky for his liking, and perhaps hinata had caught on; he was met only with silence. 

kageyama felt like crying.

**_“you can’t just say things like that.”_ **

-

he was awoken the following morning by a loud song, eyes flying open when he realized its source. sure enough, a head of orange was standing beside his bed, his face bursting into a smile when hinata realized that he’d awoken.

“kageyama! you’re awa-”

“are you seriously stupid?” he hissed, jumping out to grab his head, dragging him down as if he was afraid someone would catch them through the window.

“ow! ow ow ow, let go kageyama!” kageyama loosened his grip, glare unwavering. the smile on hinata’s face drooped slightly, expression faltering, and kageyama felt a stab of guilt in his chest, sighing as he patted the boy’s head slightly, almost unnoticeable. 

“it’s okay… i heard the other players leave a while ago. you slept in, you know.”

"what?" kageyama spun his head towards the clock, and swore. there were only fifteen minutes until practice started. “why didn’t you wake me, dumbass?”

hinata only shrugged in response, hints of the smile returning to his face. 

“you just looked so peaceful. i was kind of in awe, honestly.” hinata chortled at that, and the softness of his face startled kageyama. there was an unmistakable fondness in his laughter, something kageyama was hardly prepared for, especially this early in the morning. 

kageyama didn’t reply, couldn’t, and broke eye contact. he hardly trusted his eyes to veil the thumping of his heart, the lump in his throat. 

“let’s go.”

-

the day went by without much alarm; nobody seemed to know of his illegal roommate. coach yamiji’s relief at seeing hinata alive almost made him feel guilty, wincing when he heard the boy stutter out a pathetic lie about finding a motel nearby. thankfully, he wasn’t questioned much, and practice ensued without any further distraction. 

they began eating together again, and their peers stared, again, unquestionably baffled at the polarities of their interactions. 

although they didn’t get many chances to play together during the actual practices, he could hardly ignore that intense stare following his movements, as well as all his peers’ movements. that fervent gaze, foreign to most of the players, seemed to make them slightly uncomfortable, movements stiffening whenever they felt hinata’s focus. kageyama smirked. 

-

that second night had started out much smoother than the first, as he’d managed to sneak hinata in through the door this time. when they successfully snuck into the showers without being detected, they’d gotten too confident, too assured in their ability to remain hidden.

kageyama really should’ve checked before exiting the bathroom, made sure that the coast was clear for them to return to their room. the quiet had deceived him, and when they stepped out straight in the line of sight of miya atsumu, neither of them knew what to do, save gawk. frozen in their spots, they stared at him, minds racing to find an excuse, any excuse (thinking had never really been either of their strong suits). they stood, expecting to be chastised, yelled at, questioned: what they hadn’t expected was for atsumu to burst into laughter in front of them, doubling over and wheezing to the point where he had to lean against the wall for support. 

“you really snuck him in? you’ve really got guts, tobio-kun! i can’t believe you two.” he wheezed one last time, and caught their worried stares. waving his hand, he grinned, assuring them, “don’t worry. i’m not going to tell anyone.” he looked straight at kageyama, and raised his eyebrow. “you’re going all-out for this one, huh?”

hinata blinked, confusion clearly written on his face, and kageyama felt a sudden sense of urgency rush through him. gently pushing his shoulder, he led hinata towards their room, throwing a quick “thank you” to atsumu. he wasn’t really sure what he’d meant by that; he didn’t really want to decipher it, either.

as soon as they were both in their room, kageyama closed the door behind him, sighing and slumping against it. 

“we should’ve been more careful.”

hinata leaned against the wall next to him, letting out a smaller sigh. “yeah. but it’s okay, right? do you think he’ll tell?”

kageyama paused. atsumu seemed friendly enough, but he had just met him a day ago. and he wasn’t exactly known for being the best judge of character. 

“well, we can’t do anything about it. hopefully he keeps his promise.”

hinata shrugged in response, and stood up, steadying himself away from the wall. suddenly, he reached forward, hand headed dangerously towards kageyama’s face, and alarm jerked kageyama’s body back, away from his hand. kageyama took a step that he didn’t have, hitting the door. _what is he doing?_ he hated himself for the thumping in his chest, did his best to ignore the phantom pressure on his cheek (pressure shaped like a certain smaller hand, fingertips calloused just the right amount with shared passion, a shared life, shared home-)

the alarm must’ve shown on his face, because the corners of hinata’s mouth started lifting. it only reached a half smile, however, an obvious effort going into keeping himself from completely grinning at his confusion. 

hinata’s hand found its destination on the wall next to him, flicking off the light switch. darkness suddenly shrouded them, and although he couldn’t see it, kageyama knew that hinata had stopped fighting the smile. he could hear it in his voice, a gentle teasing in his “what are you so surprised for, kageyama-kun? we need to sleep now, right?”

he prayed that hinata’s eyes hadn’t gotten accustomed to the dark yet, as he felt the heat rise to his cheeks. _again._

“sh-shut up!” kageyama’s voice was too loud for it to be a natural response, and he winced. he only received laughter in response as hinata moved away, and as embarrassed as he was, the sound made kageyama want to instinctively reach out to grab hinata’s arm, to stop him from stepping any farther. his chest ached.

instead, he followed hinata’s steps to lie down on the own bed, dropping himself onto the sheets. just as he was about to close his eyes, focus all his energy on sleeping (perhaps sleep would erase that incident from his memories, or better yet, reality), he heard a quiet groan from under him. he turned over on instinct, peering down; there'd been a tinge of pain in that groan, no doubt.

“what’s wrong?” he did his best to seem nonchalant. 

one of hinata’s eyes opened, and he sent kageyama a smile, obviously forced. _idiot. like i can’t tell._

“nothing! nothing’s wrong. go to bed.”

he didn’t. kageyama kept his stare on him, unflinching, until hinata physically broke eye contact by turning to his other side. or, he tried to.

halfway to turning over, hinata gasped again, this time undeniably in pain. 

kageyama sat up on his bed, frowning. “something is wrong. tell me.”

silence.

“come on.”

“i’m not just going to go to bed, you know. you might as well tell me.”

more silence, and then a “why not?”

it wasn’t the response kageyama wanted, and it threw him off guard. _why?_ he thought. he wasn’t sure. 

instead of answering, he retorted with a blunt “you’re in pain, aren’t you?”

hinata couldn’t just ignore that. he sighed, and murmured something too quiet for him to hear. 

“huh? speak up, dumbass.”

another sigh. “it’s my back. but i’m fine. the floor’s just a little hard.”

kageyama narrowed his eyes, wanting to bark that he obviously wasn’t fine, _your body’s all tense, idiot._ but he didn’t, clenching his jaw. there had obviously been no spare futon, and hinata had spent last night on the cold, hard floor, the wood unforgiving on his spine, clearly. kageyama sighed. 

“let’s switch.”

swinging his legs over the bed, he prodded hinata gently with his foot, willing him to get up. hinata sat up slowly, wincing still, but eyes wide. 

“what? i can’t. this is your room.”

“and it’s your spine, dumbass. it’s fine. if you couldn’t sleep one night without pain, how do you plan on doing it for the next four, idiot?”

rolling his eyes, he sunk down to the floor, now level to hinata.

“are you sure?”

there was obvious guilt in his voice, and kageyama softened. 

“yes. now get up there.” 

“are you really alright with it?”

“that’s what i said, isn’t it? it’s fine. i used to sleep on the floor as a kid.” a lie. “my back can take it, unlike your weak excuse for a spine.”

another pause, before hinata nodded and got up to climb into bed. not a moment later, kageyama heard ruffling, frantic sounds of hinata's legs wrestling the blanket; and soon enough, said blanket landed half-on top of kageyama's face, leaving him sputtering in confusion. 

“you need the blanket if we’re switching!”

 _this idiot._ kageyama sighed internally, and balled the blanket up to throw back onto the bed. 

“it’s fine.” honestly? it wasn’t. kageyama doubted he would sleep any better than last night without the blanket. but something about the way hinata had glanced up at him before, blanket pulled like a shawl over his shoulders, made it seem absurd to take it from him. 

he could feel hinata readying to argue again, and twisted away from him. 

“no arguing. i don’t care. i’ll keep throwing it up if you throw it down, and i’ll win. like always, dumbass.”

“what?” hinata sounded more indignant now, and kageyama smiled. 

“stupidyama. who refuses to take a blanket…” the blanket didn’t get thrown back, however, and he was glad: hinata did have a tendency to be frustratingly stubborn, after all.

_so do i, though._

“hey, kageyama?”

“what now. are you planning on making us both late tomorrow? we barely made it on time today.” 

“no! listen. i feel kind of bad about this still.”

“are we still talking about this? i already told you, i’m not going to be responsible for your we-”

he didn’t really expect to be interrupted, and definitely not by those words.

“do you want to sleep here too?”

kageyama’s words sputtered to a stop, and his shocked silence seemed to push hinata onwards, and he scrambled to elaborate.

“just because! you know, it’s big enough for both of us. it’s your room, i don’t know, i feel like i just kind of burst in, and it’s like i’m not supposed to even be in this room, so i don’t know about sleeping on the bed while you’re on the ground, and you know i don’t really believe you about sleeping on the ground as a kid, i’ve seen your room-”

kageyama braved a peek at hinata while he was in the middle of his rambling, and the look on his face, cheeks tinged slightly pink and tongue slipping over words, clearly flustered, felt warm in his chest. kageyama’s body, so tense a moment ago, felt so malleable, and he almost took him up on the offer. 

“it’s fine.”

it really wasn’t fine, the way that kageyama was already imagining them packed together on that bed (yes, they would both fit, but it wouldn’t be a comfortable layout by any means, by the traditional definition of comfortable, anyway), backs pressed against each other, hinata’s warmth flooding the bed that was so cold just a day ago. kageyama had no faith in his own heart not to jump out of his own chest and trapeze on over in front of hinata’s face to scream that it was going to explode, _please for my sake, stop it,_ no faith in himself that he could be so close to holding him, soft orange tickling his own neck, and not fall even further, further into a hopeless hole.

if he didn’t know better, he would’ve said that hinata’s soft “okay” sounded a bit disappointed.  
-

so their second night had managed to slip by without any major danger (atsumu seemed to have kept his promise), and so had their third and fourth days. they were more careful, and it paid off: they were undetected by anyone else, they were sure. so when komori approached him on the last day, smiling slightly apologetically, kageyama was nothing less than completely shocked. it felt like a bucket of ice had been dumped over his head, being told that "coach is going to be visiting our dorms tonight, so hinata might need to find somewhere else today."

he stammered for a response, swinging back and forth between being defensive and grateful, and most of all, confused. finally, he gave up, shoulders slumping with a sigh.

“did atsumu-san tell you?” kageyama figured it was the case. _at least he didn't tell a coach._ and komori seemed to have kept the secret too, thankfully.

a second bucket of ice.

“no, i saw you guys on the second day, going to the bathroom.”

all he could do was stare. 

“don’t worry, i didn’t tell anyone. not going to. but you two got caught by atsumu too huh? you should be more careful.” he was laughing, undoubtedly amused by the strained expression of embarrassment and confusion on kageyama’s face. 

the only response he could think of was to thank him, so he did. only when he left did komori’s news truly sink in.

kageyama spent the entire morning scouring his brain for a plan, a way to keep hinata out of the streets so he wouldn’t die, and came out unvictorious. he was stumped. however, when he broke the news to the boy, grimacing in preparation for panic, he was met with much too calmness.

“okay.”

he blinked. _is this idiot not understanding properly?_

the boy seemed to have caught onto his confusion, and smiled. 

“don’t worry, Kageyama-kun. I’ll figure something out.”

**_”don’t worry.”_ **

how could he not worry? but he was already skipping away, fetching a stray ball rolling away.

-

lunch brought along rare free time, and kageyama waited at the entrance of the cafeteria for hinata, the same place they’d met the last few days. when ten minutes slid by with no hinata in sight, he frowned, trying to conjure up a mental list of where the boy could be. but on his way to check spot number one (the bathroom), his journey had been cut short, hinata’s distinctly high voice traveling out from the closed doors of the gym. _practicing?_

his frown deepened. _without me?_

he didn’t even know what kind of expression his already-stern face presented when he opened the gym doors to find his partner, chortling in the way he always did, talking not to himself but to atsumu, standing next to him. they were planted on one side of the net, the plethora of balls on the other side a sign that they had clearly been at this for a while. they didn’t seem to have noticed him coming in, as hinata stepped into his run up again, his eyes followed the ball, tossed to him in a curve that, kageyama hated to admit, was close to perfect. 

the ball landed squarely on the other side of the net, and hinata landed back on the ground (knees weren’t bent quite enough on the landing as he would’ve liked, _i told you to think about your knees, dumbass_ ). but he was watching atsumu, at the way the blonde looked invigorated just by having hinata next to him, the way his arm pumped at the sky the same time hinata’s did, the way his grin wordlessly screamed something he himself had grown accustomed to feeling: the feeling that he could do this forever, if it was with hinata. 

**_”i was fine with not having more.”_ **

volleyball was his passion, hinata’s passion, and that itself was an understatement. it was their livelihood, the thing he’d dedicated his life to, the thing that kept the fire in hinata’s eyes lit. they were flawless partners. 

**_“that’s really what i thought.”_ **

he was hinata’s setter. just like atsumu was hinata’s setter right now. 

**_“i didn’t even know i wanted more.”_ **

teammates. he’d always wanted teammates. 

kageyama thought he'd wanted a spiker, to be there, to hit his tosses, but he knew that wasn’t quite it anymore. he wanted one spiker, one particular small, clumsy, disadvantaged spiker. And that small, clumsy, disadvantaged spiker had wanted a setter, a spot he’d stumbled into out of what he now realized to be pure luck.

and he knew, from atsumu’s face, that there was an abundance of setters out there who would trip over their own feet to come play with hinata, plenty of setters that could’ve stumbled into that spot for hinata. he’d always known to some extent, knew that he probably needed hinata more than hinata needed him. and he’d been alright with that, alright with just being hinata’s setter, because he knew he should be more than grateful, thankful that he could even have him in his life. he probably didn’t deserve him. he’d play any role hinata needed. 

**_“it was fine to me. as long as it was you.”_ **

he just didn’t expect it, didn’t expect the sight of hinata with another person to numb his entire body, make him feel like he was the human embodiment of rock-heavy static.

when hinata followed up with a _your tosses are amazing, miya-san!_ , kageyama reminded himself that he had no right to feel so wounded.

 ** _“it was fine.”_**  
-

kageyama should’ve kept more an eye on him throughout the day. after lunch, he’d barely been able to even look hinata’s way, undoubtedly leaving the boy confused; he hadn’t done anything wrong, after all. but kageyama couldn’t stand it, that old ache returning to his chest at the cold, forceful realization that yet again, he would never be unique in hinata’s life. the sight of hinata’s hand meeting atsumu’s in celebratory high five, burned into his eyelids, had been a taunting yank into reality, and he wasn’t ready yet, not ready to accept it yet, not ready to fully give it up yet.

he’d read somewhere that you could die, from a physical heartbreak, if it was bad enough.  
-

hinata didn’t return to their dorm that evening, when he should’ve. _surely he would’ve told me where was going? or at least told me that he’s leaving? even if i was kind of an ass the whole afternoon?_ guilt pricked at kageyama’s chest. he should’ve kept more of an eye on him. maybe if he’d stayed back after practice instead of sprinting to the dorms alone, he would’ve caught him, 

pacing back and forth in his room, kageyama contemplated going to search for him himself, _again_ , when the door finally burst open. at the sight of the head of orange in front of him, slightly damp from the snow, his shoulders visibly dropped, a relieved sigh leaving his lips. 

“where were you, dumbass? i thought you were dead!” he didn’t even bother trying to hide the relief in his voice, too much bite in his worry to even begin masking.

instead of responding, hinata reached into his coat, taking out a small paper bag, not bigger than his hand, although bigger than his own. he handed it to kageyama, giving him a small smile. frowning in suspicion, kageyama took the bag. 

“i got them for you!”

inside the bag were two buns, the familiar smell of curry letting him know that hinata had gotten his favorite. 

not knowing how to reply, kageyama just stared, until hinata laughed.

“i believe the words you’re looking for are ‘thank you’, kageyama-kun.” he teased, dropping down to plant himself on the bed. 

“what about yours?” curry wasn’t hinata’s preference.

the boy blinked at him. “didn’t get any, i didn’t feel like it. they're just for you.” 

kageyama hadn’t even known that there’d been a vendor near here. 

“how did you even get these?”

“there’s a place a bit away. it’s only a 20 minute walk.”

_twenty? did this dumbass really take a 40 minute trip to get me some damn buns? they’re cold by now anyway._

**_“i thought it would pass.”_ **

something lurched in his chest again, and kageyama shut his eyes, falling onto the sheetless-bed, fiddling with the corners of the crumpled, white paper bag.

the bed dipped next to him, and he opened one eye to catch hinata scooting closer. 

he should move away. (he didn’t.)

**_”that it’d be over soon, it’d just be a weird phase.”_ **

instead, he kept staring, directly at hinata’s side profile, now way too close to his face. he could stare, because by the look on his face, hinata wouldn’t notice, his eyes planted firmly at the bag kageyama was holding. he knew what hinata wanted, but he wasn’t about to make it that easy for him. he leaned back, extending his torso against the wall, and smirked at the boy. when hinata finally stole a glance upwards to meet his eyes, he opened his mouth, to no avail. no sound escaped, and he only stuttered, cheeks tinting pink and mouth curving into a pout. 

_dammit._

**_“i wanted to run.”_ **

he had to swallow hard, keep his resolve, reinstate the smirk onto his face. when he called out, “what? you have to say it out loud, you know. ‘i can’t tell what you’re saying, if you don’t say it out loud’, right?”, his voice wasn’t as assured as he’d like, and he hoped hinata wouldn’t catch on.

“you’re so mean! i’m the one that bought them, anyway…” hinata whined, grabbing the pillow by the head of the bed and bringing it up to his face. kageyama was devastated to observe that hinata’s form disappeared almost entirely behind it, save a few tufts of orange poking out the top. and his resolve crumbled. taking one bun out (it was cold, _i knew it,_ ), he threw the bag, with the remaining bun, at the boy’s lap. hinata reacted almost instantaneously, throwing the pillow aside with a smile _way too big for just a stupid bun._

they probably shouldn’t eat on the bed, but here they were. kageyama had always thought hinata looked like a hamster when he ate, cheeks full with food like he was afraid someone would take it away if he didn’t stuff it deep into his mouth immediately. when he’d asked about it, once, ( _why do you always eat like a dumbass, dumbass?_ ) hinata had told him that it was habit, from having a sister six years younger. 

“do you like it?” when hinata asked him, face gleaming, kageyama stumbled. honestly, he hadn’t even really been processing any taste on his tongue. but he nodded, and hinata’s face broke into relief.

“good. i thought you looked kind of sad earlier, too, but now you’re all back to normal!”

_earlier._

kageyama winced, but tried not to make it show, averting his eyes and the topic.

“so, where are you going for tonight.” he tried not to sound too concerned, purposefully keeping his gaze on his hands in front of him. 

“oh? are you worried for me, kageyama-kun?” he’d failed, apparently. 

this time he was the one grabbing the pillow, chucking it towards hinata’s face. laughter chortled out from behind him, and hinata grinned. “don’t worry. i asked komori-san earlier, since you told me he already knows. he knows this place really well, did you know apparently he and sakusa-san were both in this camp last year, too? they must’ve been really amazing. i mean, i knew they were, especially after seeing them in person these past few days-”

it had always amazed him, hinata’s ability to blabber on and on about anything, ever, to anyone, ever. that pang in his chest again. _anyone, ever._ kageyama did his best to ignore the dull numbness spreading over his chest, instead focusing on how marvelous it was this time too, truly, to watch hinata manage to completely stray away from the focus of the conversation, especially when his possible life was on the line. _maybe that’s a little too dramatic._ it turned out that kageyama was not immune to the overly-paranoid attitudes of country folks towards the concrete jungles of tokyo.

“okay, so where are you staying, dumbass. try to focus, won’t you? unless you plan on dying on the streets.” he interrupted, deliberately rolling his eyes. 

“oh! yeah, well he said his aunt lives nearby, and he called her up for me. i’m taking the bus, and i’ll spend the night. after i shower, though.” hinata smiled up at him. “so you don’t have to worry.”

“i’m not worried, dumbass.”

“liar.”

“i’m not!”

“okay, liar-yama.” 

he suppressed the urge to kick him in the face. _he’s so annoying, you dumbass._

clearing his throat, kageyama slumped down to the bed, facing the ceiling. “well, then, go shower, idiot. you have to leave before coach comes around. take your stuff with you, i don’t want to risk having you seen by him on the way back to our room after you shower. you’re cutting it close on time, aren’t you, because you wanted to buy those stupid meat buns… 40 minutes away. dumbass.” hinata’s words still rang in his mind. _’because you looked sad.’_

“yeah, yeah, i know.” hinata leapt up from the bed, shoving all his belongings into his bag before heading out towards the door, and kageyama’s eyes followed him. as hinata reached down to grab his phone and charger from the plug, he groaned, crying out, “seriously? it wasn’t charging! it’s dead…” and kageyama snorted, throwing out a “dumbass” in his direction. 

grumbling, he threw it in his bag, headed back out towards the door. his feet stilled right before he opened it, however, and he looked back at kageyama, still sprawled out on the bed. kageyama startled a bit, not having expected hinata to turn back around, and racked his brain for an excuse as to why he’d been staring. the boy’s expression was surprisingly unreadable; hinata was usually the sole exception to the wide array of expressions from the wide array of people kageyama couldn’t read. before kageyama could stammer out an excuse, hinata spoke first, mouth turning into a small smile yet again, voice a bit too quiet, a bit too easy. 

“you know, you’ve been really nice this week.”

kageyama’s heart almost dropped. jerking his head to the side, he didn’t respond, and the boy continued.

“i guess you’re always nice though, deep down." a laugh. “even though you’re grumpyama for a reason.” 

he still couldn’t think of a suitable response. “thank you” didn’t seem right. so he just turned his head back forward, slowly, and looked up from his eyelids. 

“thanks, kageyama, for everything.” this time, hinata’s smile was different, missing its signature brightness, its contagiously cheerful tinge. this time it was softer, mouth not quite as open, face not as contorted with joy, moreso tinting all of his already-round facial features with gentleness, blurring the edges of his eyelashes into his eyelids, cheeks into the crinkles of his eyes. despite the differences, sincerity radiated from him, from this new smile. it startled him.

_why are you thanking me?_

-

so hinata went off to shower, leaving his words ringing in the air, leaving that smile burned into his eyelids, leaving him stunned and dazed on the bed. and kageyama didn’t really know why he did it, didn’t really know why he was speaking to the voice box on his phone, didn’t really know why his hands had clumsily dialed hinata’s number knowing it’d go into voice mail while it was dead, while hinata was in the shower, didn’t really know why his voice had cracked on the very first word. 

**_”it’s been two minutes and thirty seconds in this message already, i didn’t even really say anything.”_ **

kageyama struggled to find words, as he always did, but he’d been watching too long. he’d been watching that damn smile for too long, watching that tuft of orange for too long, watching that furrow in his eyebrows whenever he was focused, the uncharacteristic, _charismatic_ , quiet that fell on hinata from time to time. and internally, he’d been watching too, the pounding in kageyama’s head whenever hinata surprised him, whether it was with a jump or a milk box gifted to him, the pang in his chest whenever he thought about how many people had inevitably witnessed the same magnetism in hinata that he had, the habit he’d built of checking to make sure his futon was by his, the quickening of his heart whenever his name came tumbling out of the boy’s mouth. the way his hand would linger a second too long, and guiltily so, on top of hinata’s head whenever he grabbed at it in their endless squabbles; the way the boy definitely noticed, knew from the first time, but never commented on it. the idle pause whenever they split ways on the way home, at the same road every day, the mental countdown in his head until they’d reunite at that spot in the morning, one he always tried to ignore. the way his fear of looking back and seeing hinata gone, had diminished bit by bit, but the relief of spotting him, always at his side, never did. 

**_"but it's all of that for me."_ **

**_“it’s unlike me, right? isn’t it stupid? lame?”_ **

voice breaking at every word, there was no steadiness in his thoughts now, and all he could do was clutch at his phone until his knuckles turned white.

**_“but it’s you. for me, it’s you.”_ **

kageyama wanted to keep that new smile, wanted himself to stay being the only one who’d seen it, and he wanted everything else, too. he saw atsumu's smile, saw the two of their fists pump into the air at the same time, voices overlap over each other's, and he swallowed. 

as he heard the shower shut off and the trickle of water slow down, hinata’s familiar hum traveling through the walls, he did what he did best, blurted out words that he couldn't quite explain.

**_“is it me? is it me, for you?”_ **

**Author's Note:**

> i didn't know how to make the voice message format work but wanted to keep it in for the sake of the song and it shows.... ill try to make that better in the revampsldkjs
> 
> the song ends on a very unsure note so i stayed true to that please forgive me and also im thinking of writing an alternate atsuhina companion fic for this LOL


End file.
